displaced, misplaced, replaced

do you have any idea what it feels like?...the very question beaming from your eyes, a question unuttered, but profoundly there, burning your every nerve, rotting away your cells, eating at your sanity - the sheer hopelessness of it all, the one moment of clarity...this too shall pass. as a matter of fact, i do. i know that pain ever so well, i've watched it morph me into a human wreck, i've suffered in despair, but no one ever knew. i masked it so well and so do you. trouble is, now, i long for you, you suffer too and this thing can't be fixed. it's elementally flawed, each of us has this little army of skeletons cramped inside a closet too small to fit such burdens, such dramas, so many things unspoken. what we wish for is the impossible, the unreachable, the destined, the perfect, the match, but that which is never to come to pass...for literally unexplainable reasons. i can never mash them up and put them into a sentence, but it all makes such crystal clear logic in my head. you see, that's the problem really, uttering the ideas strips them of their wholeness, their integrity, their structure. why can't we try for what's within our grasp each and every day and willing, but not considered? ...i'll trow the withered flowers into the garbage bin and i will have forgotten all about how much i love you by tomorrow. probably you will have gotten back to you ol'jolly self again by next morning...i'm just hoping here for the inevitable, for we all revert to the undying state sooner than later.